The Most Common Mistakes Men Make In Bed-Women’s view

Settling For Mediocrity/Not Making An Effort:

• “Is your relationship in neutral? Many men have the impression that as long as they are not yelling at their wives, beating them, cheating on them, or leaving huge messes around the house, they must be good husbands. All that means is that they aren’t bad husbands. They are probably just average husbands. Instead of not just yelling at their wives, husbands should make an effort to say lots of wonderful things to their wives. Instead of not just beating his wife, a husband should make certain he often lovingly touches her: stroking her hair, lightly kissing her neck, gently massaging her shoulders, kindly rubbing her feet, and giving her light kisses on her cheek, nose, ears, forehead, and of course, lips. A man should only not cheat on his wife, he should passionately seduce her. Not being a total slob isn’t bad, but helping your wife with the chores is even better. Giving her a whole day or week off from her usual chores and you doing them for her is best. Men should never settle for being average. If your relationship has been in neutral, it’s time for you to move into first gear.”
• If you find that you have fallen into the mediocrity trap, then you probably shouldn’t be too surprised that your sex life has suffered as a result. Here are some ways to avoid mediocrity and rise to the top.
• One great way to avoid mediocrity and keep sex spicy hot is to learn how to make love outside of the bedroom. No, I’m not talking about making love on the kitchen counter or dining room table. I’m talking about making love with your woman in a non-sexual way. If she regularly prepares supper, do you ever ask her if she needs help? If she is the one that normally does the dishes, do you regularly do them instead? Do you help her around the house? Do you touch her in non-sexual ways? Do you ever kiss her outside the bedroom? I promise you, the better you learn to make love to her outside of the bedroom, the better she will make love with you inside the bedroom. If she is resentful for the things you do (or don’t do) outside the bedroom, how can she give herself to you fully and excitedly in the bedroom? Something to think about, don’t you think?
• Do you ever touch her outside the bedroom? One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to only touch you lady when you want sex. She will pick up on this and likely start to resent you for it. Instead, be sure to touch her often in a non-sexual way. For instance, while she is cooking or brushing her teeth in the mirror, go up behind her and give her a big hug. Or, if she is working on the computer or reading a book, go up behind her and give her a small kiss on the neck or a backrub. Pay attention. There are many opportunities throughout your day together to do this for her. She will feel appreciated and she will love you for it.

Do you ever kiss her – REALLY kiss her?

•  I say anything under 10 seconds doesn’t even qualify as a kiss. Sure, there will be times when you have to dash off to the store before it closes and a peck will have to do, but try to make those times the exception rather than the rule.

Do you spend time together?

• Make a conscious effort to make quality time for your partner every day – even if it’s ten minutes of snuggling before going to sleep. Most women need to make a connection everyday. Take a walk together after dinner. Have a laugh at the supermarket. Clean or wash the car together. Have fun doing whatever you do together. Take a class. Join a club. Support a candidate. Plan a getaway. Tickle. Be Goofy. Just make sure you spend quality time with your lady – everyday. She will love you for it.
• Create rituals that involve sharing time. No matter how busy you are, make the time. Have one night a week set aside to watch videos in bed. Go for a special brunch every Sunday. Read the Sunday paper together in bed. Make her breakfast every Saturday morning. You get the idea. Rituals are an important part of a relationship. They provide fun, anticipation, security, and mostly intimacy.

Do you talk to her?

• Do you listen to her – REALLY listen? Ask her about her day and then listen to her. Don’t try to solve all of her problems. Just sympathize with her, tell her you love her, and let her know that you are her biggest fan.

Do you compliment her?

• Do you build her up and brag on her in front of others?
• Do you help her out with chores, the kids, and housework? Does she feel overburdened?
• When is the last time you called her just to say, “I love you”?
• When is the last time the two of you went somewhere romantic?
• Take her away for the weekend. Don’t expect sex. Don’t ask for it. Just work on rediscovering what it was about each other that made you fall in love in the first place. The sex will likely follow.

Not Shaving:

• If you have a rough beard, moustache, or goatee, it can really hurt your lady when you kiss her, suck her breasts, or give her oral sex. You can test the roughness of your facial hair by rubbing the inside of your wrist or the back of your hand against your moustache, beard, or goatee. If it’s rough against the back of your hand, just think about how it must feel to her soft, delicate tissue. A close shave or using hair conditioner on your beard should take care of this problem.

Poor Personal Hygiene:

• Some ladies have complained that a few guys need more help with their personal hygiene. Make sure you brush your teeth, use deodorant, and cut your toenails, they say. Some ladies really like nice cologne, too. While our natural body scent contains pheromones, nobody wants to be with someone that lets their natural scent get out of control.

Bragging About How Good He Is In Bed:

• “Another big mistake for a guy to do is brag about how good he is in bed. I had a guy do that to me one evening. I asked him how good he was at masturbation. He said he was great at masturbation. I told him I was glad to hear that, because that’s what he would be doing tonight. Then I got up and left.” If you are good in bed, guys, she will find out soon enough. Bragging about it is not only unnecessary, it can turn her off. Being confident is great. Being braggadocios is not.

Not Giving Clear Insight Into Their Sexual Desires And Needs:

• Oftentimes, men aren’t the best communicators inside the bedroom – or outside of the bedroom, for that matter. Many women would like to know about our sexual needs and desires. Learn to open up and communicate better and you may take your lovemaking to a whole new level.

No (Or Not Enough) Kissing and Foreplay Before The Main Event:

• One lady commented, “Is this a race? An 8 second rodeo? Slow down, Cowboys!” Another complained, “He thinks foreplay is each of us taking our clothes off and lying down.” Foreplay isn’t optional. It isn’t a luxury to indulge in only when you have enough time – especially when you plan to engage in intercourse. The woman needs time for her vagina to prepare itself for penetration. Give her the time to prepare, and she will enjoy the experience on a higher level – and so will you. Instead of diving right for her crotch, spend some time kissing her, touching her, and talking to her.
• This will help build anticipation and desire. Besides, studies have shown that after 21 minutes or longer of foreplay, 92.3% of women will orgasm at some point during your lovemaking session. Not enough foreplay makes it seem like you don’t care about pleasing her and only care about your own pleasure. If your lady knows that you will take great care of her during your lovemaking, she is more likely to want to engage in it more often. That makes sense, doesn’t it?

Too Much Tongue:

• “Don’t force it. I like tongue, but not down my throat.” I’ve read this complaint from a lot of different sources. It seems that it’s a pretty common one. Don’t force your tongue down her throat like you are trying to unclog a drainpipe. That’s just not romantic. Try being soft, slow, and gentle. Try holding her face in your hands while you kiss her. Try stroking her hair or her cheek.

Giving Hickeys:

• While a lot of women really like to have their necks gently suckled, no woman wants to have to wear turtle neck sweaters for a few weeks to hide a hickey that you gave her. If you are going to give hickeys, do so on the areas where clothing will definitely cover them up, and with her permission only.

Ignoring The Other Parts Of Her Body:

• A woman has more parts to her body than just her two breasts and her vagina. There are many other areas of her body. Some have been touched less than a leprous nun in solitary confinement due to the fact that a lot of men just go right for the breasts and the vagina and forget about everything else. Spend some time touching her and getting to know her body without touching her breasts or vagina for awhile. She will appreciate the attention and will know that you are a man who truly knows how to please a woman.

Keep Your Hands Moving

• “Touch me. Don’t rest your hands as if you are tired or something. Move them over my skin all the time.” Ladies don’t want you to appear bored. Keep your hands moving. Stimulate her in as many ways as possible. If your hands need a rest, then try holding her hands with yours. Many women really like it when you hold their hand during lovemaking, as it can help you connect better with her.

Zigzag Technique:

• As surprising as it may seem at first, a woman’s skin is her largest sex organ. As a result, anywhere that she has skin can become an erogenous zone, depending on how you touch her.
• Take your fingertips in a zigzag motion and run them all over her body. The reason that a zigzag motion works better than a straight line is because with the straight line, the little nerves of her skin in the path of your straight line “know” they are going to be touched. With a zigzag motion, the little nerves “hope” they will be touched. This produces a different, more pleasant effect. Try it on your own arm and feel the difference.

Massaging Her Too Roughly:

• Women oftentimes think that a man’s touch is too rough. You have the right idea if you are giving her a massage as a part of foreplay, but you can ruin an all-good thing by being too rough with her. Be gentle unless you have her permission to be rougher.

Undressing To Early:

• Undressing too early is not the best move. This can signal your lady that you expect sex. Even if you do think the evening will turn sexual, it may be best to wait until things get a little hot and heavy and she starts to peel your shirt or pants off, first.

Taking Your Pants Off First:

• I have read from many different sources that women believe a man in only his socks and underwear is a man at his worst. Be sure to take your socks off before your pants so your lady never has to see you in a less than flattering light.

Nudging Her Head Down For Oral Sex:

• Not a good plan. If you want oral sex from her, it’s best to ask her. Don’t nudge her head toward your penis. Many women said they don’t like this.

Using Your Hand To Move Her Head Up And Down While She Gives You Oral Sex:

• This was by far the most common response that I received from my surveys. Apparently, women HATE this. You can rub your fingers through her hair, stroke her cheek, or rub her back, but NEVER, EVER force her head onto your penis with your hand.

Thrusting While She Gives You Oral Sex:

• Many women don’t like it when you thrust while they are giving you oral sex. They said they prefer you lie still while they move their head up and down. They can better control the depth and speed that way. Some women may not mind it, though. Your best bet is to ask your lady and see what she says.

Not Warning Her When You Are About To Cum While She Gives You Oral Sex:

• This was another very popular response from the women who took my survey. Not every woman likes the taste of semen. Be sure to warn her when you are about to orgasm so she can choose what she would like to do with it. Many women commented that if a man doesn’t warn her first, he would never get more oral sex from her again.

No Kissing After Oral Sex:

• “It really bugs me that he won’t kiss me after I give him a blow job.” That’s a great way to make sure you never get oral sex again, guys. If she is going to be so kind and loving to give you oral sex, the least you can do is not make her feel like a leper afterwards. Give her a big kiss and let her know how much you love her and appreciate the pleasure that she gives you.

Not Offering To Return Sexual Favours:

• This was another pretty common survey response. It seems that some men expect to receive oral sex from their women, but don’t want to return the favour. Another interesting note is that I remember most of these guys as being past partners – not current ones. Hmmmm…I wonder why!?

Poor Manual Dexterity:

• Fumbling when trying to remove her bra or panties just doesn’t cut it.

Unfastening a Bra Tip:

• I have to get something off my chest and keep you abreast of the situation. If you are like a lot of guys when it comes to bras, and you are more likely to bust a finger than finger a bust when it comes to removing one of these booby traps, then this tip is for you. First, some basic bra knowledge. Most bras fasten in the back, although some fasten in the front, between the cups. Next, know what you are dealing with. Borrow one of your lady’s bras and examine the mechanics of the fasteners. Practice fastening it and unfastening it. Wait until you are alone and sit down on the edge of your bed or in a chair with your thighs exposed. Now, wrap the bra around your thigh or thighs and fasten it with the hooks facing up. Now practice fastening and unfastening it again. When you get the hang of it, turn it on your leg so the hooks are face down and you have to do it without being able to see what you are doing. Now, you are ready for the next time you see your lady and it comes time to remove her bra. Be sure to use two hands. Don’t try to impress her with any one-hand tricks, unless you are very well practiced. Wrap you arms around her in a hug-like fashion. Grab each side of the bra clasps, one side with each hand. Fold the two sides together, pushing on one side and pulling on the other. It should come right open. Now remove the bra. Your lady will be far more impressed with a smooth removal than if you try to yank it off or whip it away.
• As for her panties, John Gray does an incredible job of describing how to best remove a woman’s panties in his book, ‘Mars and Venus in the Bedroom’:
• “A man should begin to touch between her legs only when he thinks she is ready. Sometimes it is good to first touch around the lining of the panties and gradually explores her vulva. It is very exciting for her if he doesn’t just suddenly pull down her panties. Instead, he may start to pull them down and then pull them back up a little higher. Instead of taking them off, he can begin touching her on the inside edge of her panties across the back, then the front, then along the edge down the front. Then he can put his fingers inside the edge between her legs. Once he has checked with a gentle, probing finger that she is moist, he can take off her panties. Or, instead of immediately pulling them off, he can once again delay pulling them down to convey the message that he is in control of his passions.
• Even if his passion is mounting, he can take a long time. This restraint and control allow her to feel freer to release her inhibitions and let go of control. Instead of taking off her panties, he can reach around her buttocks and expose her bare bottom. He can begin to touch and stroke her buttocks and her inner thigh from behind. Eventually, he can take off her panties and begin stroking her inner thighs and circling her whole vulva.” -Mars and Venus in the Bedroom

Squeezing Her Breasts:

• Most men squeeze a woman’s breasts like they squeeze the Charmin. A lot of women get tired of that. Stroke her breasts. Kiss them. Lick them. Caress them. Don’t just squeeze them really hard. Spend some time with her breasts. The average guy spends only 2-3 minutes per breast during a whole sexual encounter! Don’t you think your partner deserves more? Do you want to be like every other guy or do you want to stand out from the mediocre masses?
• Some women aren’t interested in breast stimulation at all. While over 90% of women report that their partners stimulate their breasts either manually or orally during sexual activity, only 50% reported that they actually enjoy breast stimulation. The rest tolerate it because either their partner likes it or because their partner doesn’t realize that the women don’t enjoy it. Why not ask your lady what she prefers.

Biting And Twiddling Her Nipples:

• Don’t clamp down on her nipples like you are going to bite them off. Nipples are sensitive. There will be some women who will really like that, but the majority of women will prefer you to be a little more gentle with their nipples. Again, your best bet is to ask. Also, stop rolling her nipples between your thumb and forefinger all the time, like you are trying to turn a radio dial to tune in a faint radio station. A little bit of that may be ok sometimes, but go for variety.
• The more techniques you have in your repertoire, the better. And be sure to focus in on the entire breasts, not just the nipples. Besides, some experts claim that the nipple isn’t the most sensitive part of the breast, anyway. They suggest that the upper part of the breast from the 9:00 to the 3:00 position may be even more sensitive. See if this holds true for your lady. Also, don’t forget about the sides of the breast and the undersides.

Begging!

• “He wanted me to do things I was NOT comfortable with, and after telling him a firm NO, he would start begging!” Guys, it’s ok to ask your lady to do something that may be a little kinky or out of the ordinary, but don’t keep begging her if she says no. Nagging her about it will only make matters worse. Besides, are you in this just for your own selfish pleasure, or is this supposed to be a physical expression of the love that you share with her? That’s something to think about. If you really love her, quit trying to make her do things she isn’t comfortable doing.

Too Impatient:

• “Start slow. Turn me on before you jump me. As a matter of fact, make me BEG you before you jump me.” This is a big one that a lot of guys need to learn. When it comes to driving a car, most guys like to take the quickest, most direct route to their destination. That’s great, but when it comes to lovemaking, taking the most direct route to your destination (orgasm) is the quickest route to sexual dissatisfaction for your lady – and her dissatisfaction leads to less frequent sex for you! After all, why would she want to have sex with you very often if she already knows it will be unfulfilling for her? Instead of taking the quickest, most direct route to orgasm, learn to take the scenic route. That’s the route that will have your woman wanting to travel your sexual highway a lot more often. Spend a lot of time on foreplay. Spend time kissing her, touching her, and telling her why you love her. This is the fuel your woman needs in order to get the most out of your lovemaking.
• The more foreplay you give her, the more turned on she will be and the more explosive her orgasms will be. My advice, and the advice of the lady who gave me the quote above, would be to get her so turned on that she begs you to make love with her. Then you know she is really ready for you and will enjoy the experience to the fullest. It’s up to you. You can race to a mediocre orgasm and have her rarely looking forward to sex with you, or you can take your time working up to an incredible orgasm and have her wanting you to work your expertise all the time.

ATTACKING THE CLITORIS.

• For many women, direct stimulation of the clitoris can be uncomfortable and even painful, especially early in the lovemaking. Some women may need you to wait until they are really aroused before they’ll find direct clitoral stimulation pleasurable.
• Some women can’t stand direct clitoral stimulation at all – even after arousal. They may need indirect stimulation. Your best bet is to ask your lady what she needs when it comes to stimulating her clitoris.

Not realizing That Many Women Need Clitoral Stimulation To Orgasm:

• Many women cannot orgasm through vaginal penetration alone. If your lady is among these, it’s perfectly normal. In fact, only around 30% of women can orgasm from intercourse alone. The rest need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm. Here are some ways to incorporate clitoral stimulation into intercourse:
• She can manually stimulate her clitoris during intercourse.
• You can manually stimulate her clitoris during intercourse.
• Get either a vibrating egg or a vibrating bullet. You can purchase these at your local adult toy store or you can order them online. Now, turn on the bullet (or egg). Start with low speed, if you have a multi-speed model, and place it right against her clitoris. Now, enter her vaginally with your penis (use missionary position). Your body will hold the bullet (or egg) in place on her clitoris while you stroke in and out of her vagina. This way, she can receive the clitoral stimulation that she may need in order to orgasm during intercourse.
• Read up on the Coital Alignment Technique (CAT). It places your body in a more advantageous position for clitoral stimulation.
• Insert your penis into her vagina as far as it will go. Don’t move it in and out. Just grind your pelvis right up against her clitoris and keep grinding. You may need to lubricate her, first, as you want to pleasure her clitoris, not irritate it.
• If you have ever watched a porno, you will see that most of the time, the two people involved only have physical contact at one point of the bodies – the genitals. Try some better coverage than that. Cover her like Deion Sanders covers a wide receiver. Put your body flat against hers, touching at as many points as possible without hurting her. A lot of women will really love the extra coverage and I promise you won’t get penalized for holding! It may also allow for better contact with the clitoris.
• Using a long, narrow, silky scarf, place it’s midpoint behind your penis and testicles. Bring the ends around to the front, just above the base of your penis and tie them together firmly, but not painfully, in a large knot. The larger the knot, the better. You may even want to tie several knots to maximize the size of your knotted area. Be sure to leave the free ends at least a foot long. During missionary-position intercourse, your lady can grab the free ends of the scarf with her hands and pull back and forth on them to stimulate her clitoris with the knot.
• When you are on top in the missionary position, instead of having your legs inside of hers, try putting them outside of hers. With her legs together, she will get more stimulation than normal and you are more likely to make contact with her clitoris as you thrust. You can still thrust the usual way, but a circular motion like you are stirring a drink with your penis really works well.
• Another way to help provide clitoral stimulation during intercourse is to gently hold her butt cheeks apart during intercourse.
• Use the “Clockwise, Counter Clockwise Technique” during intercourse. Insert your penis fully into her vagina. Now grind lustfully against each other. You grind in a clockwise motion while she grinds in a counter clockwise motion. This allows for terrific clitoral stimulation.

Not Listening or Paying Attention To Her Needs:

• If she tells you to ease up a bit, or move a little to the left, or says something else to help give you direction and you don’t listen, then you not only aren’t going to give her the most pleasure possible, you also may frustrate her. Listen to her directions and follow them.

Being Inconsiderate:

• “He keeps lying his shoulders down on my face so I can’t breathe. I told him a few times that I’m suffocating, but he doesn’t seem to get the message.” Again, guys, I’m going to have to ask you – are you in this for your own selfish pleasure or do you really love the lady you are with? You have to listen up. Pay attention to your lady and her signals, both verbal and non-verbal. Don’t zone out and only focus on your own pleasure. If you want to only focus on yourself, then get off of your lady and read up on some great masturbation techniques.

Inattention:

• “He’s kind of clumsy and sometimes hurts me. When I groan with pain, he mistakes it for a groan of pleasure. The only time he ever noticed was when I screamed and almost jumped off the bed.” Reading this one, I can’t help but think this is the fault of both parties involved. I believe if the lady is uncomfortable, she has a responsibility to tell the guy in no uncertain terms that she is uncomfortable. Groans of pain can be mistaken for groans of pleasure. On the other hand, guys, you should be so tuned into your lady that you should know what she is feeling. You should also be talking to her. “Are you doing ok?”; “Are you comfortable?”; “Do you need anything?”; “How does that feel?”; “Are you enjoying yourself?”

Taking Direction Too Personally:

• Several women mentioned that sometimes when they give us direction in the bedroom, such as asking us to ease up a bit, we take it too personally and get our feelings hurt as if we weren’t doing a good job. “If I told him I didn’t care for something he was doing to me in the bedroom, he’d start to whine and get his feelings hurt.” Don’t take direction personally, guys. Pay attention to it so you can learn how to better please your woman. Consider yourself lucky that you have a woman who will give direction. Would you rather have your woman say nothing, but secretly be uncomfortable with what you are doing to her?

Too Mechanical:

• “You can sometimes tell when a guy has studied something to try to please a girl and he seems all mechanical and stuff, trying to remember everything step by step. Not cool! Go with the flow!” Learning new things to try in the bedroom can be extremely fun. Many ladies love that their men are always trying to keep things fresh by learning new things to try out. I have a word of caution for you, though. Women like the lovemaking to flow naturally. So, having a dry erase board next to the bed with step by step instructions for that new move you just read about is a horrible idea.
• Your woman wants you focusing on her, not on trying to remember some silly move. Don’t get me wrong, new ideas are great. I completely enjoy learning new things to try out in the bedroom. I’m just suggesting you do your homework and learn the technique outside of the bedroom so that when it comes time to try it out on your lady, you can do so while completely focusing on her and not on trying to remember the technique.

Being Distracted During Lovemaking:

• One lady commented, “Keeping the television on is very distracting. If it must be on, please switch it to a music channel.” Another complained, “Never say lets hurry up and get this over with, the game is about to come on.” Your lady must feel that there is nowhere else on Earth you would rather be and nothing else you would rather be doing right now than making love with her.

Signature Moves:

• “The biggest mistake my past lovers have made is to assume that what worked on a previous lover (or lovers) to help them achieve an orgasm is what must work for me, too, even after I have tried to get through to them what DOES work for me. I believe it is my responsibility to let them know what does work for me, but it obviously doesn’t do any good if they are still going to insist on doing things the way they “know” is best.” Many guys have a signature move that they are really fond of.
• Because they have had success with the move in the past, sometimes they may be guilty of focussing too much on it with a new girlfriend. No move works on every woman. Everyone is different, remember? Go ahead and try out those moves that have worked well for you in the past, or that great move your buddy said drove his girlfriend crazy. Just be sure to pay attention to what your girl’s moans and wiggles tell you about it. If she lies there like a bump on a log, grabs your hand to stop you, or pulls back from your touch, then try variations – harder, softer, faster, slower, etc.
• If you find a variation that works for her, remember it – then you’ll already have a head start for next time. If you still get no response after the variations, move on to something else. I have heard women complain that some men are bound and determined to make their “signature move” work at all costs like they have a one track mind. Such behaviour can be frustrating and ruin the mood.

MENTIONING PAST LOVERS.

• “The dumbest thing any man can do is talk about past lovers while out on a date, let alone in bed.” The last thing your lady wants to hear about is all of your past lovers. If you want her to feel special, you need to focus on her and not on your past lovers. Make her feel like she is the only woman in the world when she is with you.

Thrusting Too Hard Or Too Fast:

• According to many ladies, when it comes to intercourse, one of the worst things you can do is thrust away right from the start like a rabbit in heat. Take your time. Start slow. Build up to faster thrusts, if that’s what the two of you like. Another one of the worst things you can do when it comes to intercourse is to thrust too hard, like a runaway jackhammer, right from the start.
• Remember that as you thrust, your hipbone can dig into her stomach or thigh. The harder you thrust, the more painful this can be for her. Sometimes your lady may request harder thrusts. If so, then by all means, give her what she wants. Just be sure she is ready, willing, and able to accept your hard thrusting before you attempt it. If your lady asks for it hard and nasty, here is a terrific tip to help you give her hard, deep thrusting:

Headboard Leverage Technique:

• Sometimes, your lady might want good, hard, deep, vigorous thrusting penetration. Here’s a technique to help you do this a little easier. Lie down on the bed in the missionary position, but turn 180 degrees so your feet are facing the head of the bed. Scoot down to where your feet are right up against the headboard. Using the headboard with your feet will give you the extra leverage you need for some forceful thrusting from the missionary position. Be sure to keep your lady relaxed. Don’t let her get into a tensed body mode.

Squishing Her:

• Be careful not to put too much of your weight on her. Men are generally larger than women are and this can be painful for her. If she is spending too much time and energy thinking about being able to breathe, she isn’t concentrating on her pleasure – or yours.

Barking Directions:

• Unless you are role-playing, don’t bark out instructions like a drill sergeant. Speak to her in a soft, gentle, loving voice or your little soldier’s sex life may be missing in action for a few days.

Talking Dirty:

• Many women like it when you talk dirty to each other in bed. Others don’t. Don’t make the mistake of doing so without knowing if your lady likes it, first. Your best bet is to ask her.

Spanking Her:

• During your sexual activity, don’t spank your lady without her permission. There will be a lot of women that will really enjoy that. There are a lot of others that really won’t. Don’t do it to your lady until you find out what she thinks about the idea. You could catch her completely off guard and upset her. She might even smack you back – and not in a good way!

Attempting Anal Sex And Pretending It Was An Accident:

• If you have trouble finding the right hole, one lady suggested purchasing a GPS system or taping a map to your headboard. If you want to try anal sex, you have to ask her first. Attempting this without asking first and then pretending it was an accident is not acceptable. If you are truly unsure of what you are doing, then brush up on basic female anatomy before you do anything else.

Stopping For A Break In The Middle Of The Action:

• During oral sex, if you can tell that she’s getting close to orgasm, don’t stop for anything – not even if your tongue feels like it will fall off. If you do stop, even for a minute, you will likely have to start all over again. Most women can’t pick up where they left off. Here are three tips for you. The first is for when your tongue becomes tired in the middle of the action. The second two are tongue strengthening exercises to build more tongue stamina.

Tired Tongue Tip:

• If your tongue gets tired while pleasuring her, just curl it up against the outside of your upper lip. Now, you can still pleasure her with the exposed backside of your tongue while your tongue rests and still not break the sensation of softness and heat that she is enjoying. By the time you need to do this, there should be enough lubrication from her to avoid any dryness.

Tung-Fu Technique:

• This is an ancient Chinese Taoist secret exercise to strengthen the tongue for oral sex. Hang an orange on a string. Use martial arts on it with your tongue. Jab it. Move it from side to side. Lift it up. After a few weeks, graduate to a grapefruit.

Lifesaver Tongue Stamina Tip:

• This is a great exercise to gain tongue endurance for oral sex. Hold a Lifesaver at the front of your mouth in the upright position, either between your lips and gum or just inside your teeth. Now, using tiny tongue motions, dissolve the lifesaver from the inside out. Like great oral sex, this takes time, patience, and a strong, nimble tongue.

Not Caring Whether Or Not She Cums:

• This is the best way to ensure she’ll never make love with you, again. Guys that cum and then roll over and go to sleep without finishing off their ladies will forever wonder why they can’t keep a good lady.

CUMMING TOO SOON.

• If you are prone to premature ejaculations, then be sure to have a back up plan in mind to finish your lady off. It is not ok to have an orgasm yourself and then give up on the lovemaking. You should finish what you start.

Not Cumming Soon Enough:

• Many men may think that thrusting away for an hour without Cumming is the mark of a sex god and is every woman’s dream for their man. Well, most women aren’t looking for a marathon man of such proportions. Most women get raw and numb after awhile and are ready for it to end. So, don’t cum too early, but don’t take too long, either.

 
Asking Us If We’ve Cun Yet!

• “When a guy asks whether I’ve come yet, it kills any momentum I might have had. I hate that.” Guys, it’s great that you are concerned with your ladies pleasure, but if you ask her about her orgasm in the middle of the act, it can not only be an added pressure for your lady, it can also take her even further away from orgasm. Afterwards, if you ask her and she did cum, you might feel foolish for not recognizing the fact that she did. If you ask and she didn’t cum, you might feel foolish that you didn’t give her an orgasm. Either way, it’s probably not a good idea to ask. Some women said they wouldn’t mind, though, as long as they were asked afterwards. Ask your lady about her thoughts on the situation.

Asking Me If It Was Good:

• “It’s always good, but if the guy asks me, then my impression of him drops a few points because if he was really paying attention, he would have known it was good.”

Condom Disposal:

• Condom disposal is the man’s responsibility. Don’t leave it behind for her to clean up. Not only is this thoughtless, it also may make her wonder if you’ll expect her to clean up after you all the time in other areas of your life.

Not Snuggling After Sex:

• Most women really like to snuggle after making love. This is a terrific time to make the emotional connection that most women (and a lot of men, too) need. A good rule of thumb that I really like is to always let your lady fall asleep first. This serves several purposes:
• She can never accuse you of rolling over and falling asleep right after sex.
• It prevents you from keeping her awake with your snoring.
• You may find it really relaxing and reflective to just hold your lady for awhile as she sleeps. Look at her, think about what she means to you, and think about how much you love her.

Rushing To The Shower Immediately After Sex:

• “Right after sex, he rushes to the shower. That makes me feel like I’m dirty.” Guys, many women have said that they feel dirty when you get up immediately after a lovemaking session and head right for the shower. Try not taking a shower immediately afterwards. A lot of people even sleep that way until morning. If you must run for the shower, make sure she doesn’t think you are running away from her. Give her a big kiss and tell her she made you so hot you have to jump in the shower real quick to cool off. Better yet, why not invite her along.

Getting Dressed Or Leaving Immediately After Sex:

• This sends the message that you got what you wanted and now you are leaving. This is not a good message to send if you would like a repeat performance in the future. Spend some time with her and don’t leave immediately afterwards in most circumstances.

Treatment, Counselling, sex Education & Therapy
Counselling and sex therapy are sometimes effective in helping patients with sexual problems, especially when caused by psychogenic reasons. Sex therapy promotes education and relief of symptoms of sexual dysfunction. Marital and personal counselling is targeted on interpersonal and relationship issues which contribute to resolving a couple’s or an individual’s psychological and emotional dysfunction.

For Direct Consultation & Chennai Camp

Dr.D.Senthil Kumar, B.H.M.S., M.D (Alt Med)., M.Phil(Psy)
Consulting Homoeopath & Psychologist

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